The modern version of "There's a hole in my bucket"

You know the song – Henry and Liza have a circular conversation such as this:

There’s a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza,
There’s a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, a hole.

Then mend it, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry,
Oh mend it, dear Henry, dear Henry, mend it.

With what shall I mend it, dear Liza, dear Liza?
With what shall I mend it, dear Liza, with what?

Try straw, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry,
With straw, dear Henry, dear Henry, with straw.

It goes round in circles. Henry needs to get a sharpener to cut straw to mend the hole in the bucket. But the sharpener needs to be wetted. Liza suggests wetting it. But Henry says he hasn’t got any water. So she says fetch some and then he says he can’t fetch some because there’s a hole in his bucket….. It’s all good fun.

The modern version goes something like this (except I can’t currently get it to go round in a circle):

LIZA: Did you get my text message?
HENRY: No dear.
L: Why not?
H: Because I turned off my phone to conserve energy. Remember you asked me to get the on/off switch fixed so I could switch it off and conserve battery?
L: But you mustn’t switch it off – you won’t get urgent text messages from me.
H: But how do I conserve energy?
L: Go onto the “save energy” option.
H: Where’s that?
L: In settings under energy options.
H: I don’t see it.
L: Ah. You must have an old version. Have you updated your iOS recently?
H: No. I am a version behind.
L: Why?
H: Because I can’t update it because I don’t have space.
L: Why is that?
H: Because I can’t get rid of my photos onto my PC to create space.
L: Why not?
H: Because I have tried three times and spent hours trying to transfer the photos but I can’t do it.
L: Why not?
H: OK I’ll try again.
THREE HOURS LATER
H: I found a hidden file problem. I have now done it. So I now have the photos on my laptop. I now have free space. H: I can now do the update so that I can change to low energy so that I can always be on to receive text messages.
H: What was the message anyway?
L: I was stuck in traffic.
H: Oh right. But you’re here now talking to me aren’t you?
L: Yes.
H: Ah well, all’s well that ends well.

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