Others may disagree, but I like to think that I am normally calm and polite.
But, when I am alone with Radio 4 Today, I am occasionally aware of a beast in the car with me, shouting at John Humphrys:
SHUT THE **** UP
And the Neverendum has most regularly brought that beast to the fore.
Alone in the gym last week, I was aware of the beast as I watched Nicola Sturgeon being interviewed on a ferry (she was on the ferry, I was on the treadmill). I’m actually sure Nicola Sturgeon is a good person with a good brain. But she has that Salmond habit (they are both fishy people) of having that little suggestion of a smirk, which says:
I am super-intelligent and you, oh interviewer, are a complete numpty and I will have to explain to you why you are a complete numpty, even though I am actually talking complete bollocks myself.
I heard the beast:
STOP SMILING YOU ******* ******
And what of Alex Salmond? Well, there the beast is not allowed to escape any more. My radio off switch is pictured below. It is a nice chunky one which can be, in emergencies, hit with the flat of my left hand, with some force. So I don’t know what Salmond is saying these days because my hand gets to the off button before he gets into his second word. So the beast hasn’t pronounced on Salmond recently. How is he doing?